Truth, Justice, the New American Way
Faster than the speeding bullet and using infra red detection to locate humans’ location, SuperBushMan has been helping to guide Israel’s bombs to reach their target.
Superman has been an epitome of American’s ideals for truth and justice for so long. “As his substitute, and when those ideals change, I am adapting my nature to those ever evolving cutting edge values,” SuperBushMan clarified.
“It really makes law enforcement easier,” said Ehud Olmert, current Israel’s prime minister.
“We’re saving cash. We got bigger bangs per each missile,” Ehud added. “Hezbollah won’t give up even if we kill thousands of them. So far we can only kill 100 due to our lousy ground troops. That left killing civilian’s infrastructure as the only way left to make the enemies yield.” Ehud clarified further, “C’mon… Every body knows it.”
“Finally, someone embracing my teaching” Osama Bin Laden stated latter approvingly in his next video hit. Osama expressed anger over his businessman twin brother that died in the attack. “I think businessmen have shorter life span than terrorist overlords. If only he stops being a businessman and join my path,” Osama lamented. “It’s his fault. In the world we live in now, you should start terrorists business rather than banking business. There’s more money. You’re more powerful to reject threat. Innocence don’t pay. Terrorists on all sides can simply come up with various excuses to kill you anyway.”
SuperBushMan then justified his action, “I am defending innocents. What a better way to do so than defending people’s right to defend them self by making the process more cost efficient,”
“You (help) killed my whole family,” cried 6 years old Ali bin Hasan, whose dad worked helping Jewish’ refugees during the Nazi era and whose Mom used to sell G rated fat free kosher pancakes.
Ali then hit SuperBushMan with a flying round house tiger cane shadow meld jihad kick that could have been deathly to most people. SuperBushMan then bites off Ali’s head in self defense to provide samples he wanted the rest of us to follow.
“Yummy,” said SuperBushMan.
“Fuck, I am joining the Nazi,” said Karl, Ali’s neighbor that is spared the bombing because he was visiting his mom in German. “It could have been me,” Karl added. Hassan, Ali’s other neighbor, is joining Al Qaeda shortly after.
“That’s actually a good thing,” said Ehud Olmert. “Some twenty years from now, I’ll have more excuse to self defending every belligerent men’s right to kill all civilians in the world.”
“With SuperBushMan vetoing all the countries in UN, when else I can do this stuff? By failing to prevent the kidnapping of some soldiers, the pro free market Lebanese civilians try to bring the whole world into another world war. That’s why they deserve extermination” said Ehud. Ehud then added, “Kidnapping soldiers is bad okay?”
Ehud then moved on warning Lebanese not to ever give any soldiers a bad hair cut. “You’d never know what we’ll do to you because of it,” winked Ehud.
Most political analyst thinks that it’s only so bad if you don’t have enough SAM sites against jet fighters suggesting more weapon expenditures from all sides.”
Ehud then explained further, “Actually, buying those land is cheaper than buying jet planes, but I got more support back home doing it this way.”
“Hail Ehud!” cries hordes of Zealot extremists raising their right arm and clasping their heels.
“The Jews Ubber Alles,” answered Ehud.
“However, I totally oppose death penalty even against serial killers and hardened criminals like Samir Kuntar,” SuperBushMan continued, praising anti Israel’s anti death penalty stance against the terrorist murderer that killed 4 Jewish family.
He added, “I prefer some long life time sentences that’ll motivate his friend to capture some soldiers to free him causing all this exciting opportunities to keep military generals on payroll. It’s not the terrorists that must die. It’s everyone else in both sides.”
“By choosing not to bring Samir to death penalty, even at the huge costs of money, and civilians on both sides, Israel governments show that they hold the sanctity of humans’ life even for those least deserving it,” continue SuperBushMan. “Imagine how well they value the life of those more deserving it than Samir?” SuperBushMan reasoned.
“But of course, peaceful businessmen and soldiers are subhumans that have less priority to live than even a vile terrorist, so it’s okay to kill thousands of them than to kill a convicted mass murderer. Ask Stalin, Mao Tze Tung, Hitler, or any other politicians,” argued SuperBushMan.
“In fact, I am actually pro life and the sanctity that all it entails,” added SuperBushMan recalling his valiant effort to prevent removal of feeding tubes from Terry Schiavo.
Even SuperBushMan cannot prevent all crimes though.
During 9/11, when the twin towers got hit by plane, for example, Lois Lane, along with thousands of other women was kidnapped, raped, gang banged, and tortured to death by various criminals. But SuperBushMan was nowhere to be seen due to serious law enforcement somewhere else.
“USC. § 2252C. Misleading words or digital images on the Internet
‘‘(a) IN GENERAL.—Whoever knowingly embeds words or digital images into the source code of a website with the intent to deceive a person into viewing material constituting obscenity shall be fined under this title and imprisoned for not more than 10 years.
‘‘(b) MINORS.—Whoever knowingly embeds words or digital images into the source code of a website with the intent to deceive a minor into viewing material harmful to minors on the Internet shall be fined under this title and imprisoned for not more than 20 years.
‘‘(c) CONSTRUCTION.—For the purposes of this section, a word or digital image that clearly indicates the sexual content of the site, such as ‘sex’ or ‘porn’, is not misleading.
‘‘(d) DEFINITIONS.—As used in this section—HR 4472 EAS
‘‘(1) the terms ‘material that is harmful to minors’ and ‘sex’ have the meaning given such terms in section 2252B; and ‘‘(2) the term ‘source code’ means the combination of text and other characters comprising the content, both viewable and nonviewable, of a web page, including any website publishing language, programming language, protocol or functional content, as well as any successor languages or protocols.’’.
(b) TABLE OF SECTIONS.—The table of sections for chapter 110 of title 18, United States Code, is amended by inserting after the item relating to section 2252B the following:
‘‘2252C. Misleading words or digital images on the Internet.”
exclaimed SuperBushMan, reciting the law by heart thanks to his super brain.
We got to protect our parents’ right to control what their kids can watch.” SuperBushMan added.
SuperBushMan then flew to beat up some mom for buying her kids some game with MA-13 VRC’s rating for his coming next birthday.
The kid is, legally, only 12 years old.